Joeyisms and Mad Dawgies

Here we go again....

I waved at a guy at Dahls to let him know he could back up in front of me.
Joey: Mom, do you know that man who you waved at?
Me: no
Joey: Okay- how about from now on, we don't wave at people we don't know, okay?
(Clearly, he is not from a small town!)

Joey: When I grow up, I'm going to work at Subway and sell soooooo many sandwiches mom. You will not believe how many I'm going to sell. I will sell the most.
Maddox: When I grow up, I'm going to be an astronaut.
(I've gotta tell you, I'll take the occasional free 6-incher from Joey versus a moon rock. Just sayin')

Uncle Cary: What kind of fish did you catch, Joey?
Joey: An Ass. (He meant 'Bass' but thought they were called 'Ass')

Lisa (cousin/daycare): Isn't it sad Joey? Next year, Chuckie will be in college and we won't get to see him every day. That makes me sad.
Joey: Lisa, just be happy he's here with us now.

Maddox: Mom, when Joey walked up the stairs, he farted the WHOLE way up! I'm going to try that! I want to fart the whole way, too!

Joey in the bathtub: Mom, guess what? I farted and Maddox burped - AT THE SAME TIME! Can you believe that? How is that even possible?

Joey: Mom, what does "little ass" mean?
Me: It's a very bad word. It means your "butt" - but it's bad.
Joey: Why don't they just say "Booty" or "Bum"? Then they wouldn't have to say 'little ass'. You know?

I had just finished setting up an entire "city" for the boys- with all of their superheroes and superhero houses and after 2 minutes, they decided they didn't want to play with them.
Me: Maddox, please play with these- I just got it all set up for you.
Maddox: Nah.
Me: Fake Crying (usually this works)
Maddox: Mom, you don't have to cry. You can play with these all by yourself.

Joey: Mom, I am going to draw you a pciture of my black glove so you know what color it is.
Me: Joey, I think I know what your black glove looks like.
Joey: Okay, well when you forget, just tell me and I'll draw you a picture of it.

Joey: Oh, mom, it's going to be sooooooo long before I'm a teenager. I really want to play those T for teenager games! (Good thing he didn't say "I'm DYING to stay out past my curfew and talk back to you every day!")

Joey: Mom, I got chocolate milk on my shirt. Is it going to stain?
Me: No. Mommy has some stuff to put on it that will help get it out.
Joey: Oh - OxiClean! Is that what you are going to use? I didn't know you had that! OxiClean works good! (He told me he learned that on a commercial).

Maddox had gotten in trouble, I had disciplined him, he stuck his tongue out at me and ran away from me so I ran after him, and thus, disciplined him again.
Me: Maddox - you do not do that, understand? Next time, when I tell you to do something, you do it. Got it?
Joey: Maddox, you should run faster next time!
(I couldn't help but bust out laughing! My discipline mode at the moment went out the window!)

Stay tuned for the next edition!